Bonus Brady! The Brady Girls Get Married!

“The Brady Girls Get Married,” 1981 TV Movie

Oh. My. God. Last night was a much-needed evening of R & R after a long week. The husband had the remote, and I’m zoning out, and suddenly, he rests on this movie. Killer. Naturally, I hit record on the DVR and forced the 8-year-old to watch. Actually, he just sort of gravitated to it.

Jan and her boyfriend Phillip, who has Asperger’s Syndrome (and I mean that affectionately), finally get engaged after what is described as a long courtship. Mike and Carol, however, are hesitant to give their blessing because Marcia is 3 years older than Jan and she should get married first, even though she doesn’t have a boyfriend and seems pretty happy being a single gal in the city. Jan becomes moody (no way!), and Marcia expresses her concern about the situation to a strange afro-ed white man with a really cheesy mustache who sits next to her in a cafeteria. And just like that, Marcia and the stranger – whose name is Wally (as in, “Don’t be sorry, just be Wally,” which is still to come) fall in love and get engaged. Problem solved! Jan can get married now! And lucky Jan gets to share her wedding with Marcia! Surprisingly, Jan seems to have no problem with this, but of course, there are problems with the theme of the wedding. Jan and Phil – I mean Phillip – want a boring, stuffy wedding, and Marcia and Wally want a hip wedding with sandals. They all fight, Alice comes to town and does a bunch of work and cries, and then they cancel because they can’t agree on a theme. But then Marcia arranges for the two couples to meet and drink cheap wine at Phil’s – I mean Phillip’s – favorite stuffy restaurant and they agree to have a cross-cultural event. Since Peter cannot get leave any time but that very weekend, they even push the wedding up. Despite a sudden rainstorm and a destroyed cake, the wedding goes off without a hitch in the Brady living room, and then Carol sings broadway style. Then, the two couples buy a house together and as my son describes, “put tape all over it and then took it down.” I guess they were hoping to make this a madcap series, complete with unusual living arrangements, unconventional sexual innuendo, communicative misunderstandings, and a nosey neighbor, but Three’s Company threatened to sue, so they had to call it off. 

My son’s initial reaction – “Why didn’t Jan wear her glasses?”

Revelations of mine:

  • I couldn’t help but think of The Love Boat as I watched this, since most of the cast had been on the boat by then and this is what they looked like. I’d kill to see Carol sitting in Captain Stubing’s lap while she sang just one more time.
  • Cindy’s hairstyle hadn’t changed at all. The poor girl had some horrible bangs trauma.
  • Greg, a 25-ish-year old gynecologist?
  • Poor Peter, even a loser in the military.
  • Gawd did Bobby get ugly or what? And the short-shorts he was wearing did not do him any favors.
  • They took some liberties with everyone’s ages here. Since when is Marcia three years older than Jan? And if Jan’s out of college and starting her career as an architect, then this makes her about 22. Cindy is a freshman in college, so she’s 18, and there’s no way those girls were 4 years apart. Could it be that Cindy had to repeat a couple of years? Can a lisp hold you back that much?
  • I would have loved to have seen Tiger reappear in this one.
  • Nice to see that Mike and Carol have not yet remodeled the kitchen!
  • Marcia and Jan got to move the horse statue into their new home. If I was Cindy I’d pitch a real fit about that.
  • Mike offering the grooms “marital advice.” Creepy.

Most humiliating moment for Alice: Recalling her wedding night, during which Sam bowled a 286.

Next Viewing: It’s Bobby’s turn in the spotlight, so “The Drummer Boy,” of course.

Categories: The Brady Bunch Project | Tags: , , , , | Leave a comment

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